Friday, August 29, 2008

updates, updates

Ok...so again, it's been a long time since I've posted...which is kinda sad because I was doing REALLY well for a while. I was pretty proud of that :(.
A LOT has gone on lately and I hardly know where to start! So, this will be just a quick update on some changes in my life recently:

First and foremost: I AM PREGNANT!!!! There are people that think I'm silly for telling this soon (although I don't think 8 weeks is too early), but everyone who really knows me (and my family will testify to this), knows that I SUCK at keeping important secrets. Honestly. I used to tell Robert what his presents were going to be. And I kept my ears out for stuff too...I was kinda an awkward kid looking something like this:
(except, I looked nothing like Will Smith :)
Anyway, both Jared and I are VERY excited and I honestly can't wait until I'm really fat! I love pregnant bellies! Also, I've been very fortunate not to be that sick. I've only actually thrown up once! I've learned I just have to keep food in my tummy. So, we're gonna have a little Taylor Kelly Payne or Jared Gavin Payne in April (the estimated date is April 9th).
In other news, we're back to house hunting. And, we actually found a house we're putting an offer on! It's out in Queen Creek and it's PERFECT! It's this cute little 1600 sqfoot house with 3 bedrooms and 2.5 bathrooms...and get this: it's only $100,000! So cheap! It's less than a block away from my sister and her family too (all of them are really hoping we get it). Anyway, it's out at Ironwood and Ocotillo..so I'll need to find a new job. There is NO WAY that I want to drive all the way out to freaking 7th st and Thunderbird in North Phoenix if I'm living in Queen Creek...so I'm kinda job hunting right now.

I think I've already talked about this, but I'm one of the Laurel advisors in my ward. I LOVE my calling! honestly, this is the first time that i've ever felt like I'm exactly where the Lord wants me to be. My past callings I've liked and I know bishops are called of God and give callings based on the Spirit, but I REALLY feel that this time! I love my girls! they are just so cool and everything that I wish I'd been back then!

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Conflicted

I'm staying home from work today. Now, based on this blog title, some of you may assume that I lied to my boss to use a sick day...but no. I really am sick. The reason I'm conflicted is because I'm happy and sad about it. I feel a huge responsibility for my job...I feel really bad when I'm not there to do my part. And, I know that if just one person is gone, it's kind of a struggle to get everything done. On the other hand, I'm VERY secretly pleased with myself for giving in to my needs and taking a day off. It's like a mini-vacation in my mind to stay home from work, even if I am sick and can't enjoy the time off as completely as I could if I was healthy. I'm really doing a little victory dance inside that looks like this:


Seriously folks. WHY WHY WHY do I feel so guilty about missing work? That's insane! And not only that, I feel guilty if I miss church or school because of sickness too! Why! I'm retarded...